Guest blog by Paul Kidwell
Its Christmastime, the season that is supposed to bring us all hope. Yet when we are confronted with so much uncertainly, we might find it difficult to be optimistic. Still, I manage to see hope in places where I least expect it.
In my neighborhood is a couple who inspires me. They are always together, which in itself makes them special. But what makes them truly stand out is the clear affection the man shows the woman. He helps her count her change in the local drug store, and when they leave the store, he takes her by the arm and guides her across the busy intersection. At the local pizza joint he cuts her pizza up into bite-size morsels and then wipes the errant sauce from the corner of her mouth. His feelings for her have nothing to do with looks, money, social status, or professional standing. You see, neither has any of these.
Alan and Dorothy (not their real names) are what we might call mentally challenged, slow, or retarded. They always will be conspicuous, never really fitting in. Alan is overweight and unkempt, and his walk is unsteady. At the corner Dunkin Donuts, when he orders breakfast for Dorothy and himself, slurring his words and often speaking a bit too loudly, he clearly makes those within earshot uncomfortable. They avert their eyes, not wanting to acknowledge their uneasiness with this couple. And yet they have much to teach us, particularly Alan, through his devotion to Dorothy.
Im sure I am not alone in my search for the meaning of God. After years of attending various churches, listening to countless sermons, and reading thousands of pages of text from an array of books ranging from the Bible to Christopher Hitchens, I find myself still miles away from understanding who God is and what he means in my life. Is he the Father of Jesus, is he Buddha, Allah, or a Hindu Vishnu? Maybe hes none of these, or maybe a combination of all. Or maybe hes a she, or just maybe God doesnt exist at all. Im still really not sure.
But I am certain that if a God does exist, the essential message of this spirit is that hope comes from the love we show each other. No matter the denomination or the deity we choose to follow, each one tells us that love for one anotherstranger, family member, or friendis central to life lived here on earth. How often have we heard that God is love? Is it just a clich, a throwaway line? Or do we really feel and believe it?
I know Alan is imbued with love for Dorothy and, if you go along with this thought, filled with the spirit of a God. One look at him lumbering down the street will tell you that love just percolates within his heart. In Alans life, this God of love is alive and well. And he (or she) has chosen this improbable man to guide and stir me toward a richer and more meaningful understanding of the potential in me.
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Paul Kidwell is a public relations consultant and writer. He lives with his wife and son in Boston.
Paul. That is fantastic! I don't know your academic training, but you have just captured the essence of faith — by whatever name. To me, there is no explanation for Love, except to believe that there is a Force behind it — and what we see, in people like Alan, is the expression of that Force. And I tend to call that Force God.
Comment by Roger — December 20, 2009 @ 3:08 pm
Thank you, Roger. My training is in communications and business, although I have spent my entire lifetime seeking out my spiritual self. It’s still a work in progress and an experience I love. Perhaps interestingly, I was part of a ministerial staff of a local Boston church (battlefield promotion as opposed to seminary training) which was a lovely experience and allowed me great insight to “church-e-ocracy” and was an important brcik in my overall foundation. Presently, part of my spiritual journey is going to the “church of matlack” and writing within the Good Men forum. A privilege that has given me enourmous satisfaction and the opportunity to take more steps that may get me closer to that God you spreak of. But, for now I am content living a life that embodies the essence of a god that teaches me to love unconditionally and selflessly. Thank you, again for your kind words.
Comment by paul kidwell — December 20, 2009 @ 11:56 am
Paul – what a wonderful story. You confirm what I strive to live with every breath – that there is only love and fear. It's my choice which I opt for in any situation and if I choose to react or respond. The thing that's so funny about the age we live in is we think we are at the peak of potential and intellect. We wear degrees as if they are what make us. I am so hopeful that movements like the Good Men Project will awaken men and women to the Age of Consciousness. There in lies the true connection with that one source that connects us all. We need many religions, just as we need many types of food cuisine. One type of food doesn't appeal to all. AND the connection between all religions – when I have dug deep enough – is the same thing – we are all one. We come from the same place and go to the same place and heaven is on earth. My job is to see me in Alan and Dorothy – as there is a part of me in everyone. I just have to awaken to seeing it.
Comment by Bobby — December 21, 2009 @ 6:27 am